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Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Babysitting…Grooming Your Future Stepmother For Dad's Midlife Crisis

I’ve heard guys joking around for as long as I can remember, saying things like, “old enough to bleed, old enough to breed” or “old enough to bleed, old enough for me”.  The first thought that has always come to mind…pedophile…but I just chalked it off to guys being pigs.  As I’ve gotten older, I’m beginning to think there really is some truth to those sayings in the mind set of some middle age men. 
As a mother of a teenage daughter, I am becoming increasingly more disgusted with the pedophiliac nature of this class of middle age men in crisis.  It makes me puke in my mouth to see them dating girls about the same age as their daughters.  Of course they’re flawless…they’ve not yet been infected with that body changing condition that has a life-form clawing and kicking trying desperately to escape for nine months…known as pregnancy…nor have they’ve not been alive long enough or had boobs long enough for gravity to take its toll. I then find myself wondering what they would do if their daughter started dating one of their friends?

I’m sure there are advantages to dating a girl the same age as your daughter.  They’d have so much in common…same taste in music, same style clothes, similar friends, parents the same age…I mean the list goes on and on.  I can just see dad introducing the girlfriend to his daughter.  “Honey, I’d like you to meet your new sister/mom.  I think you’ll really like her!”  Then imagine the kinds of conversations they could have:  Daughter: “Remember that year we went to church camp and Nathan was there.  He’s so sexy!” Girlfriend: “You’re dad is sexy, and amazing in bed!” Daughter: “Is your dad single?  Maybe you can introduce us and we can double date.”   I’m not sure these men should go introducing the girlfriend to their sons just yet or they might be competition!

Buy a sports car or motorcycle; start hitting the gym or change your style of dress or hairstyle to be younger and more “hip”; abandon your families and trade your woman in for a younger model; throw away your careers and party away all your money...just don’t think we’re all jealous of you.  It’s not jealousy, it’s repulsion.  Had you started dating the same girl a few years ago, you’d have been jailed for child molestation, and labeled a pedophile for life.  To the teenage daughters, be nice to the girls you babysit…you could be grooming your future stepmother for your dad’s midlife crisis.

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